[act 1] [act 2]

Nijinsky
A game of solitaire for two.
© Alexei Burykin
© Translated and edited by John Freedman

A Few Words on the Entity that Is Nijinsky (Author's Note)

Nijinsky is an improvised meeting between Genius and that Actor which every one of us is; an "eye-to-eye conversation - we certainly have met in the other world."
The Actor's thinking mechanism, though not uninventive, falters and ultimately grinds to a halt beneath the rush of those waves (rhythmic waves included) whose source is Nijinsky. My Nijinsky. The signature of genius, one is inclined to think, is distinguished by its list - it's all a matter of degrees. Nijinsky is the Actor's center of gravity; that spiritual burden which is not so easily revoked. (After Vaslav Nijinsky had long since abandoned the stage due to his diagnosis of "schizophrenia," Alexander Benois said of him: "That terrible sight arouses in me envy, not pity.")* However, the tormenting quest for understanding provides the Actor new moorings, insofar as poetry can be that. What remains is the sound of rain tapping out the rhythm of solitude.
These few words are not a cover letter for a perspicacious reader. More likely, they are a sketch without shadings.

***
* I recommend that actors read Benois's entire letter to Sergei Diaghilev, dated December 28, 1928. I have quoted from it twice here.

Alexei Burykin


Dedicated to
Oleg Menshikov

NIJINSKY: I love to speak in rhyme.
ACTOR: Does sir love poetry?
NIJINSKY: I am poetry.

CHARACTERS:
Nijinsky
An Actor

AÑT ONE

(Vaslav Nijinsky tumbles out on stage head over heels)

NIJINSKY. I'm free! I'm free! Those voices! I can't stand them! I can't take it anymore! (Goes into a telephone booth, picks up the receiver and dials a number) Hello, police? Help! Some maniac has been following me all morning! Evening? So what? What's that got to do with anything? You mean if I don't tell you, you're going to leave me unprotected? All alone? One on one maybe even with murderers? How should I know!? I’d be happy to tell you. But I don't see any street signs or store names. There's nothing. Except for this phone booth. The number? (Erases the phone number) I can't read it. I said, somebody completely erased it and I can't make it out. Same goes for you, buddy! You're more dangerous than my maniac. We haven't even made it to the Second Coming yet and you've already lost your mind! (Humming gaily, he hangs up the phone. Dials another number) Hello? Oh, what a velvety voice. Yes, yes. You know, I can tell what someone looks like just from their voice. You don't believe me? Hmm... You have blue eyes, a cute 1ittle nose, thin lips and a little dimple on your chin. Am I right? What charming laughter! Who are you, by the way? No, you tell me first. No, no, no... The fire station? I totally forgot! I called to tell you that I'm trapped in a raging fire. Where? All around me! Everything is consumed in flames. The whole world is trapped in a conflagration! Oh, yeah? Your voice changed. You have a disgusting figure and you're flat-chested! (Hangs up the phone and hums happily. Dials a third number) Hello, doctor? I'm dying. Of love. For mankind. That's not important. Listen to what I made up today. "God grant I don't go nuts!"* Thank you. Everything you know about the soul and the brain adds up to nothing. Less than nothing. Because there's nobody else to call! Oh, all right. Hey, wait a second! I mean, you are a first aid service, aren't you? Quick, give me the number of the Central Public Whorehouse! I can’t find it listed in the emergency section!

(Nijinsky hangs up the phone and leaves the booth, bumping into the Actor, who is carrying a small suitcase. Pause)

ACTOR. Got a match? I got separated from my lighter somewhere. Oh, that's right! You don't smoke! Basically, me neither. But sometimes, like whenever we meet, I can't help it. I mean, cigarettes are pure evil, but I can't do a damn thing about it. Too bad? Too bad! Too bad. Then it'll have to be a cigarette break without cigarettes. Kinda like music without sound or a play without words. But, we will be healthier, won't we? What's that? No, no, no. I have this thing against hotels. That's why I came straight to you. I thought through everything I have to say and I know all about your illness. I’m a big fan of peace and quiet. Just like you. (Puts down his suitcase) Have a seat.

(Nijinsky sits down)

Get up!

(Nijinsky doesn't move)

(The Actor holds out his hand) What's that? Rain? Here? I must have imagined it. (Sits on his suitcase next to Nijinsky. Takes out a cigarette, a lighter and lights up) I once was acquainted with... Well, not really acquainted, but during my rounds I used to run across a certain, you know, client who, were it not for certain alarming dreams, would have thought he was a king. Not of the world, mind you, but of endless space! The entire universe, so to speak. And you know, all he needed to convince him of that was to close himself up inside a nutshell. (Laughs) He was brutally betrayed and then they killed him. I think he was crucified.

(Actor locks a grip on Nijinsky, who doesn't react. The actor lifts Nijinsky's arm and turns his face to the side. Nijinsky remains in that pose)

And so, basically, all his dreams revolved around one thing. He kept getting on a train to go to his own funeral. How's that for a story? But then he'd realize he wasn't the one who had died. It was his name had died. Then he'd either stop the train or, in one of the other variants, he' d break out a window with his body and hurl himself out with the train still charging down the tracks, get up.

(Nijinsky stands up)

Lower your arm.

(Nijinsky drops his arm)

Or, maybe I got it all mixed up? Maybe there were two patients. I mean, clients. Maybe one had dreams and the other closed himself up in nutshells. Tell me prince, are you much of a ladies' man? (Laughs) I ask because just recently, by total coincidence, I can into an old acquaintance. A remarkable lady. A striking brunette who is always in pants and a straw hat. She is simply crazy about athletics and athletes. You, uh, no? Yes? No? Well, it doesn't matter. That's the image you project. Naturally, she's not married. I recommend her highly. I'd be happy to relinquish her. Don't bother thanking me. (Leans towards Nijinsky) Or, perhaps brunettes aren't your type? (Suddenly leaps up and starts racing around Nijinsky) Then I’ll find you a blonde or a red-head! Believe me, right here, backstage of life, there are more good-looking broads than you can shake a stick at! And if you're indifferent to the female sex in general, that's no problem either! (Stops and wipes his brow with a bright handkerchief) Whew! You do keep a pace! I can't keep up with you! What a pleasure that you're so silent. There's nothing boring about you! As the, uh, ancients used to say, "Silentium significare." Now, in the arts this very silentium is extraordinarily valuable, don't you think? "Stop the racket, won't you people? Let's recapture silentium primeval!" Splendid! However, my preferences lie elsewhere. Prepare yourself for a real blow. You see, of all the arts, I prefer the ballet. Do you enjoy the ballet? Isn't it a wonder? Not long ago I attended the debut of a totally unknown young dancer. My, but how he galloped across the stage! Frisky, gracious and handsome! But I just can't remember his name. H's one of those names, you know, a little like... Ah! I can't remember! They say they found him in the corps de ballet. How could I have forgotten that? I think it starts with an "m." Wait a minute! I have the program with me!

(Nijinsky falls off the suitcase. Pause)

Why so silent? You really don't think your silence will stop me on the road to truth? Believe me, nothing is simpler than reconstructing everything. Everything! Your labors, your liars (gets carried away) your loathers, your loonies, your lackeys, your loners, your losers. (Suddenly snaps out î! it) My dear man, there are untold numbers who can easily testify to the truth about you. Do you hear me? The truth. About what happened wherever it was you really were. It's elementary. It's so easy.

(Nijinsky and the Actor speak simultaneously, paying no attention to one another)

NIJINSKY.
I see through all.
I don't need talk
To grasp what's up:
I see through all.
They disagree:
“You do not know him,
Or her or us,
You cannot know me!”
I see through all.
I see the truth
In deeds uncouth. As plain as that.
What's that you say?

ACTOR.
It would be a hell of a job to find them all. And, to tell the truth, I don't have the money. Still, I’d hate to just give up on a tempting idea like that. Maybe I’ll take a different tack. Go visit them all myself. Who cares what it costs? It'd be worth it. But that wouldn't be very smart. To just drop you in a spot like this. They might even accuse me of being a traitor. On the other hand, if you're going to be pig-headed...

ACTOR. What did you say? I’m not joking. By the way, it was a coincidence brought me to you. Not even a coincidence, really, a fluke. I’ll tell you about it later. You'll get a kick out of it! It's a great story with a real fantastic flair! However, from the point of view of our little case, so to speak, the most important thing is for you to calm down. No nerves. No stress. I'm going to help you get back on your feet. How's your diet? What medicines are you taking? Do you sleep well? Are you bothered by nightmares? How about voices? And, finally, how are your bowel movements? Relax and close your eyes. Shut them, I said! We'll take care of this all by ourselves. Now, imagine a seashore caressed in sunlight. The scent of seaweed, the cry of sea gulls, the rustle of waves and surf, the sea, the sea...

(Nijinsky leaps up and begins running around the Actor, roaring)

Hey! What are you doing? I came to... How are you going to hear sea sounds? Calm down! I am your friend! I came to help you! Why upset yourself like this? What are you doing?! (Running out) Wait right there! I’ll be right back! Only... You won't even be able to count to sixty, and I’ll be back. (Disappears) No more than sixty!

(Nijinsky stops running. He opens the Actor's suitcase. It is empty. Nijinsky’s vision of his parents, Tomasz and Eleonora)

NIJINSKY.
Flesh and dust –
Threat and fear!
Shall I disappear? Or shall I let him in?
Or, maybe, kick him out of here! But without
Your word - bereft of your consent
I know I'm doomed to
Shouts
And screams
And bitter discontent!
Now, here I am! I’m whole again!

TOMASZ NIJINSKY.
To break and sunder fate, my son, that is my art.
Don't waste your time: evil brooks each glancing blow.
Don't copy me. Allow for all to be and then
Seek to forgive. Find peace in your own heart.
Live a king unto yourself. Why disavow
Your solitude, and thereby violate those laws
You make yourself? I swear:
Nowhere will you find a crueler lot in this drab life.

ELEONORA NIJINSÊA.
How can I describe
My shapeless fears in words?
My speech has died.
My sounds are poor.
I cannot say it right!
Î son, dear boy,
Safeguard your precious life!
Danger, pass him by!
Shield my boy from shame!
Show him love, not hate!
Spare him pain!

NIJINSKY.
The circle is complete. And now
My goal's to leap from it!
I need an out.
I know this guest before me represents
The universal aggregate,
But where's the out?
Does a duel with this pretense
Have any chance of making sense?

(The Actor runs in holding a straight-jacket. He doesn't see Nijinsky)

ACTOR. (Indecisively) Now, I got ó... Hey! Where are you? Ha-ll-oo! Come out, come out, wherever you are! I won't hurt you... You just can't turn your back on him! Where did he disappear to? Weird, weird, weird... There's no way... Where could he have gone to? He's gone! He's gone! Well then, here goes. It's all or nothing! (Flips à coin) I’m either à prince or à pauper! (Catches the coin and looks at it with satisfaction) Aha! Call me à prince! All right, then... (Begins looking for Nijinsky)

NIJINSKY.
My Lord! What grace and wonder –
Renouncing people and the words
They speak! Breaking free
Of gods! Sensing musical vibrations
With every fiber of the body!
Silence! Silence! Silence!
To softly blend with Nothing, Nil and Never,
In the mirror of mirages!

(The Actor spreads his arms and shrugs his shoulders. Flips à coin again, catches it, looks at it)

ACTOR. Bah!
NIJINSKY. One minute, thirty-seven seconds.
ACTOR. (Startled) What?
NIJINSKY. Is that how you keep your word?
ACTOR. What do you mean?
NIJINSKY. I counted up to ninety-seven.
ACTOR. So what?
NIJINSKY. You didn't keep your word!
ACTOR. I didn't give my...
NIJINSKY. You promised to return promptly in one minute.
ACTOR. (Finally gathering his wits) Obviously, you should have counted more slowly. Where were you?
NIJINSKY. In Kiev. That's where I was born. During Shrovetide. That day I received my first-ever gift from my father when I was just à few hours old.

(The Actor fumbles with à straight-jacket, pretending he's paying no attention to Nijinsky)

My father was à better dancer than I. But he was à drunk and never accomplished anything. The last time we saw each other, he gave me some cuff links made out of stones from the Ural Mountains. I remember him standing on the dock. He was waving à blue handkerchief at the steamer I was leaving on. I never saw my father again.
ACTOR. What about your mother?
NIJINSKY. I learned to walk, talk and dance all at the same time, and my mother - who kept track of every new tooth I got - would never be able to say when I had my first dance lesson.

(Pause)

ACTOR. Please, go on.
NIJINSKY. The family disintegrated. My brother died...
ACTOR. In à madhouse!
NIJINSKY. Yes, I had just turned...
ACTOR. Eight-teen-years-old.

(Pause)

NIJINSKY. We always liked each other. And I loved working with my sister. She always understood my slightest gesture. For à long time I had no news about either her or my mother. The absence of information for several years was terribly painful. Then I just didn't care anymore.

(Pause)

ACTOR. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! It's the absence of information that determines our actions, isn't it? But what about your daughter?
NIJINSKY. I was enraptured by her singing. She would sing like this - "ah-ah-ah-ah" - and I was happy. Because it meant that everything is joyous and nothing is terrible. As for my son, things were more complex...
ACTOR. You mean you had à son?
NIJINSKY. I know very little about him. He hasn't been born yet.
ACTOR. I see. You have been through à lot, haven't you, sir? May I call you "sir"? But you should know I truly want to help you.
NIJINSKY. (Becoming animated) Really? Are you rich?
ACTOR. (After à pause) How much do you need?
NIJINSKY. I know money is à filthy thing, but I need some badly in order to undermine the World Stock Exchange. I’m going to make money on its collapse!
ACTOR. Undermine the World Stock Exchange?! What do you mean? What for?
NIJINSKY. Death! The World Stock Exchange represents death! But I will win and God will help me.
ACTOR. (Taking out à check book) Well, I am indebted to you for saving me à good deal of trouble. How much do you need? Don't be shy.
NIJINSKY. Couldn’t you make it in cash?
ACTOR. Sorry, but I don't have much with me. I'm afraid it wouldn't be enough to get you à taxi ride... (sniggers) down to the World Stock Exchange.
NIJINSKY. Don't worry. I've got two-hundred and fifteen francs of my own hidden away.
ACTOR. Two-hundred francs...
NIJINSKY. Two-hundred and fifteen!
ACTOR. What do you need money for? Let's just imagine that you amass an enormous sum on the market - although the market isn't à game of roulette, you know.
NIJINSKY. I am convinced I will win, because I am life.
ACTOR. (After à pause) And what are you planning to do with your earnings?
NIJINSKY. I'm thinking about going to à bordello.
ACTOR. You're thinking about going where?
NIJINSKY. I know it sounds crazy, but I always wanted to learn more about the psychological make-up of prostitutes. I’ll take on à couple...

(The Actor grunts in surprise)

I get overwhelmed by an amazing sexual excitement and à terrible fear at the same time. Blood rushes to my head and I'm afraid I'm going to have à stroke. But if that's what God wants, then I’ll give the women all my money for free. I won't ask them for anything.
ACTOR. How gauche! That's despicable!
NIJINSKY. Despicable? Of me? I hate despicable acts. (Pause) And if I've ever done anything despicable, it's only because at that moment I was blinded to the presence of God in my soul.
ACTOR. Listen, what right do you have to talk about God in the same breath with bordellos?
NIJINSKY. Hmm... Do you happen to wear à monocle?
ACTOR. Pardon me?
NIJINSKY. À mo-no-cle.
ACTOR. No. I do not wear à monocle. I only wear glasses when reading.
NIJINSKY. What do you usually read? Public relations prospecti?
ACTOR. Words, words, words...
NIJINSKY. So, do you refuse to give me à loan?
ACTOR. No. What are you worried about? Of course I’ll give you à loan. You've got me all confused. Is the good sir serious or is he making fun?
NIJINSKY. The good sir is serious! (He suddenly grabs the Actor)
ACTOR. What are you doing?
NIJINSKY. Shhh!
ACTOR. What is going on?
NIJINSKY. Quiet! I hate people bothering me when I'm working.
ACTOR. Working? (Explodes) What are you doing, for God's sake!?

(Pause)

NIJINSKY. I am à master at reading expressions. I can tell à liar just by looking at his face.
ACTOR. (Wiping off his face with à handkerchief) What am I, pray tell?
NIJINSKY. Let me give you some advice: Dedicate your money to love.
ACTOR. Are you saying I'm à liar?
NIJINSKY. Love is the oldest word!
ACTOR. So, who am I? Who am I? Who do you think I am? Who am I?
NIJINSKY. Life is not sex and sex is not God.
ACTOR. Oh for Christ's sake, would you quit invoking the Lord's name everywhere you shouldn't be? Quit playing the parrot: God, God, God!
NIJINSKY. (Suddenly angering) Aha! So it’s you, then! You were always sneaking around behind my back! You think I’m afraid of you? Get out of my sight! You were always hiding out and sneaking around keeping an eye on me! I didn't invite you! And I don't need your filthy money! They sent you to kill me, didn't they? To destroy my life. It won't work! Get out! Get out of here! I suspected you from the very start! The air itself quivered when you came in here. I could feel it constrict my throat. But God wants me to stay. And as for the errors I have committed, I, more than anyone, have redeemed myself through my life and my suffering!
ACTOR. (Shouts) Name! Whose name shall I make the check out to? Come on! First name! Last name! Be quick about it!
NIJINSKY. No, no. I don't know. No, no, no.

(À long pause)

ACTOR. Well then, do you know the exact amount you need to get your game started? Don't refuse my money, because, as I understand it, God himself is sending you off to the World Stock Exchange. And who else is going to help you besides me?

(Nijinsky is silent)

You see?
NIJINSKY. (Softly) Y-e-s, I suppose you're right. Everything is just as you say. Forgive me, please. I wasn't being fair.
ACTOR. Oh, let's cut the sentiment. So...
NIJINSKY. I really don't know how much I need exactly.
ACTOR. Here are à thousand francs. Go on, take it. (Offers Nijinsky the money)
NIJINSKY. Thank you very much. You are à very noble and à very cunning person. I accept this money from you as à loan and I will immediately go down to...
ACTOR. Immediately?
NIJINSKY. I would ask you to step out. À change of clothes is in order. I have many very nice suits, travelling suits included.
ACTOR. But it's nighttime.
NIJINSKY. Are you sure about that?
ACTOR. Well, everything is relative of course.
NIJINSKY. Perhaps, in truth, it is evening. Or, for example, morning. Last evening I saw Mars and it was absolutely uninhabited. I know this planet well, although I am not under its influence. And you?
ACTOR. What? Mars? You mean "that planet covered in ice, which, one million years ago, was just like our planet Earth, and which risks à similar fate if no one listens to me" - that is, you, of course - "and if no one closes all the factories"? Uh! Did I quote you properly?
NIJINSKY. Yes, yes, that's the planet. Nobody ever paid any attention to me! If God had ordered me to go, I would have done what Tolstoy did in his time. He ran away from his wife. I read his books and it always seemed to me I understood him. He wanted to save the Earth, too.
ACTOR. But you, where would you go, sir?
NIJINSKY. Oh, my political platform is extraordinarily simple. It merely consists in being at one with the entire world.
ACTOR. (Smiles) Are you able to do that?
NIJINSKY. What?
ACTOR. Are you able to be at one with me?
NIJINSKY. Don't laugh, you miserable cur! What I want to know is, what are you doing here? I was wrong! They were right! Don't touch me! Don't even come near me! How can you go anywhere in shoes like that? Can't you see what they look like? That's disgusting - to come bursting in here in filthy shoes like that! Maybe you're right. Maybe it is nighttime, but don't expect à farewell handshake from me! I wouldn't even consider touching à person in shoes like that!
ACTOR. What about my story? Don't you want to hear my story?
NIJINSKY. What story?
ACTOR. The one that brought me to you. I was out taking à walk...
NIJINSKY. I don't care about your story.
ACTOR. ...the sun was shining on the shrubbery...
NIJINSKY. I've got enough stories of my own.
ACTOR. ...and suddenly I noticed blood...
NIJINSKY. I am inundated in stories like... What? What did you notice?
ACTOR. Blood on the grass. À tiny trail of bloody spots.
NIJINSKY. And then what?
ACTOR. I followed the trail.
NIJINSKY. The what?
ACTOR. The trail.
NIJINSKY. Why did you follow the trail?
ACTOR. You know, I don't really know. But the sight of blood, somehow, just attracts attention.
NIJINSKY. I see.
ACTOR. Uh, I started walking around the woods, like à real sleuth bloodhound, until I came upon à precipice. And at the very brink, the trail broke off. I leaned over to look and - you wouldn't believe it! - there wasn't anybody there.
NIJINSKY. Who did you think you'd see?

(Pause)

ACTOR. Maybe à person... But you know what amazed me more than anything? This was the real killer. When I turned around - you won't believe it! - instead of blood, there was à pile of goat manure! Imagine that! All that time I had been fooling myself, following à false trail. I don't know if my imagination just got the better of me or if I suffered à sun stroke. But the reality was plain to see: goat manure! Nature is the greatest genius! I burst out laughing and went back to my hotel.
NIJINSKY. The same thing happened with me!
ACTOR. That's just what I wanted to verify.
NIJINSKY. Only, I was moved by God's will and it was winter.
ACTOR. Winter, was it?
NIJINSKY. Yes. I followed the trail of blood, fully convinced that this was the place where the murder had taken place. I stopped at the edge of the precipice and looked down. And, in fact, there was no one there.
ACTOR. Goat manure instead of blood!
NIJINSKY. I'm no biologist. All I knew was that God was testing me. On my way back, I shouted, "I fear Thee not! Thou art Life, not Death!" Suddenly, I saw blood in the snow again. That's when I got angry.
ACTOR. You were, so to speak, beside yourself?
NIJINSKY. Yes, on occasion I step out of my... I mean, I escape... But He said to me, "Stop!" and I stopped. "Stop reasoning," and I stopped. I stood there so long my hands started aching from the cold. And then I heard His voice one more time: "Go!" He said to me. And I went.
ACTOR. Were you alone?
NIJINSKY. (With irritation) I already told you!
ACTOR. All right, all right, all right. Only, why all these intricate fabrications?
NIJINSKY. This is all very close to me. It could never have happened to you! You're just à silly fool who turned what happened to me into à joke. The only thing that has any significance in reality is whatever God commands.
ACTOR. I presume God will not be insisting on the committing of any murders?

(They both stare at one another)

NIJINSKY. (After à pause) I looked through the evening papers and, while I don't know German, English, Italian or Hungarian, they are all accessible to my understanding. And I understood that there had been no murder. French, à little bit.
ACTOR. And so, it was winter.
NIJINSKY. Or, maybe summer.
ACTOR. (Sarcastically) How about autumn?
NIJINSKY. Or spring. I know you don't believe me, but I'm not angry with you. I absolve even my murderer of everything. Goodbye.
ACTOR. Are you kicking me out?
NIJINSKY. Why is it that I always have to explain to anyone and everyone why I want to be left alone with myself?!
ACTOR. I'm not just anyone. And anyway, I think you're better off not remaining in such dangerous company.
NIJINSKY. That' s none of your business. Farewell.
ACTOR. What about your trip?
NIJINSKY. What trip?
ACTOR. (Grinning) To the World Stock Exchange.
NIJINSKY. I just received à telegram. I've been invited to Paris. To perform…
ACTOR. (Interrupting him) Who invited you?
NIJINSKY. I have to get myself ready.
ACTOR. May I have à peek?
NIJINSKY. Why should I have to lean on the printed word to prove what I said?
ACTOR. That's not the point. (Snatches the telegram from Nijinsky)
NIJINSKY. (In confusion) I will not tolerate anyone messing in my affairs! I don't need an impresario!
ACTOR. There is à date here. March 9, 1914. When was that?

(Pause)

NIJINSKY. I can see by my never-failing watch that it's time for you to go. And please do have à shoeshine boy clean your shoes!
ACTOR. What do you want to know the psychology of prostitutes for?
NIJINSKY. What?
ACTOR. You led me to believe that you are interested in the psychology of prostitutes. I can offer you several brochures on the topic. It makes for fascinating research!
NIJINSKY. Who did the research?
ACTOR. I did!
NIJINSKY. You? What do you have to do with it?
ACTOR. l'd like to ask you the same thing.
NIJINSKY. It's crucial for me, because I... When I was... Uh, weren't you just about on your way out?
ACTOR. Curiosity kept me here. Now, you were saying - when you were...

(Pause. Nijinsky takes off à shoe and throws it at the Actor, who ducks)

NIJINSKY. Excuse me, but I had no other choice. God ordered me to do that.
ACTOR. And what if God... orders you to kill? Me, for example. What will you do?
NIJINSKY. I will obey him. (Takes off his other shoe, throws it at the Actor, hitting him squarely)
ACTOR. This is not farewell. (Disappears)

(Nijinsky’s visions: his wife Romola Pulska, and Sergei Diaghilev)

ROMOLA PULSÊA.
Don't worship him! He poisoned you.
And ever since, his iron grip
Won't let you slip away.
You do not owe him fame,
His stamp is shame.
And I, for evermore, will be your slave.

NIJINSKY.
That's à pretty tune! What say we play
À little game, à double comedy?
Who now is in the suit of prostitute?
Dance married us. Hear that?
The music plays! The time is up!
Your cue! Let's cancel all the gossip!

ROMOLA PULSÊA.
Î, dance! À hymn to flesh and prancing
Life! À simpleton could never understand the
Dance! À wild, writhing path
That leads the heart into an avalanche
Of earthly passions!
Dance, thanks to you...
I thank you, Dance!

SERGEI DIAGHILEV.
Prancing life? Whose lips
Have uttered that? Your hissing,
Lisping voice bears naught but death.
Until you shut your trap no one shall ever
Understand the soothing sounds
Of him so pure... The heavens themselves
Would sooner crack, you snake, than you
Admit: The blame is all your own!

ROMOLA PULSÊA.
I must say, dear man, your fitful gust
Is nothing more than empty fuss.

SERGEI DIAGHILEV.
You lie. It hurts!
Say now: Did you
Not steal him,
Tricking me by hunting out
My weakness?
And did you not, my friend, with your own hand
Effect his plummet from the heights
Back to oblivion?

ROMOLA PULSÊA.
Oh, but how I love him!
I am his pulse, his extra sense.
And you are fear, the persecuting fear of misery.
You know the art
Of burning others in yourself and turning them to ashes!
You love...

SERGEI DIAGHILEV.
Enough.

ROMOLA PULSÊA.
You love...

SERGEI DIAGHILEV.
Enough!

ROMOLA PULSÊA.
You love another now!

SERGEI DIAGHILEV.
Enough, I say!!!

ROMOLA PULSÊA.
I love it when he hurts so much,
When he can't bear to look me in the eye.

NIJINSKY.
I am the bone of contention; the arrow
Striking to the marrow of the human soul,
In hopes of splitting open that ripe
Fruit. Óås, we know that good remains
The eternal root of evil.
How silly are their efforts!
The picture of pure madness!
No matter how you spin it,
Virtue ever runs in step beside the Devil.
(Enter the Actor in à woman’s make-up)

ACTOR. I welcome you on behalf of the Central Public Whorehouse! Reservation number double-0, 0, 0, one. Privacy is guaranteed.
NIJINSKY. Let me get à better look at your face. Come closer.
ACTOR. You don't think I’m trying to deceive you?
NIJINSKY. I should warn you. Everyone everywhere (hesitates) considered me insane.
ACTOR. You don't say!
NIJINSKY. I’ll tell you à little secret.
ACTOR. I adore other people' s secrets!
NIJINSKY. I don't like to be around people or among grown-ups. I don't know how. The only thing I like is to be with children.
ACTOR. Our institution is not equipped to help you with that. Farewell.
NIJINSKY. Farewell.
ACTOR. (Offended) I am so young! One might even say unsullied!
NIJINSKY. Answer one question.
ACTOR. Money up front.
NIJINSKY. Money is evil.
ACTOR. That' s my business. If you get what I mean.
NIJINSKY. I’ll teach you how to use make-up.
ACTOR. What's wrong with mine?
NIJINSKY. You have to transform yourself from within. Turn yourself completely into another being. You don't have what it takes for that.
ACTOR. (Wiping off his make-up) Why? I can try.
NIJINSKY. (Harshly) Tell me immediately! How far is it to the sun?
ACTOR. How should I know?
NIJINSKY. I’ll kill you.
ACTOR. (Quickly) 150 million kilometers.
NIJINSKY. How about to the moon? Come on.
ACTOR. Three hundred and eighty-five thousand. What the hell are you driving at?
NIJINSKY. Both, to tell you the truth.
ACTOR. Is that so? Allow me to introduce myself: Sergei Pavlovich Diaghilev. Vaslav, my dear boy, don't you recognize me? How have you been?
NIJINSKY. (In disgust) Don't try taking him on. That's no role for you.
ACTOR. Do you remember that hotel?
NIJINSKY. Drop him, I said!
ACTOR. We had just been introduced and you were so weak...
NIJINSKY. (Aloofly) I fainted.
ACTOR. Yes! You just plopped on the floor. I was so afraid for you that I called the doctor.
NIJINSKY. The doctor found nothing wrong and you brought me an orange.
ÀCTOR. I took your hand in mine…
NIJINSKY. (Suddenly) I was out of money! How many times do I have to tell you? I need pocket change for minor expenses! I can't be bothered with that every moment of the day!
ACTOR. (In confusion) But I... I gave you à thousand francs. That's all I had with me.
NIJINSKY. I need two thousand francs by tomorrow. And I have no desire to wait any longer! I am à free man and I do as I please!
ACTOR. Of course, of course. But who pays your bills?
NIJINSKY. I don't need support like that! I want my own money and I want to spend it however I want. You don't even allow me the most basic needs.
ACTOR. What do you consider the most "basic needs?" Where did you go last night, just to spite me?
NIJINSKY. I didn't do anything to spite you! Yesterday, the day before yesterday, or the day before the day before yesterday. I'm sick of constantly being followed.
ACTOR. You can do anything your heart desires.
NIJINSKY. I'm not talking about the ballet. How come the sheets aren't changed more often? Tell them I want the bed changed every morning!
ACTOR. What are you talking about? Vasily is in charge of that.
NIJINSKY. Vasily follows me! Get him away from me! I see his disgusting face everywhere I go!
ACTOR. À face no worse than any other.
NIJINSKY. À mug.
ACTOR. À face.
NIJINSKY. À mug!
ACTOR. À face!

(Long pause)

NIJINSKY. Now comes the blow with the walking cane. Like this! (Hits the Actor)
ACTOR. (Shocked) What are you doing? That hurts.
NIJINSKY. It hurts me, too.
ACTOR. You scum! (Flies at Nijinsky, begins beating him) You scoundrel! You liar! Do you know who you are? You're à two-bit hoofer, that's who! You madness is hereditary. And if you hadn't made such à huge, mysterious legend out of it, you would have been nothing but fine print in à ballet encyclopedia. The only time anybody would ever remember you would be when some teacher in à kid' s ballet school was showing some kid how to jump! You're an ape! (Walks away)

(Long pause)

NIJINSKY. I wonder whether we are nothing but lonely rhythms?
ACTOR. Shut up. I’m asking the questions, and you're answering. You go that?
NIJINSKY. When?
ACTOR. What do you mean, when? Now! Now! Now! I'm asking you: Is that clear?
NIJINSKY. Is that already the first question?
ACTOR. Don't get smart with me!
NIJINSKY. I need time to collect myself. It's been ages since I gave an interview.
ACTOR. What can I do to help? Pop you in the face?
NIJINSKY. Very funny. All right, I get you.
ACTOR. What?
NIJINSKY. (Making faces) You... are going... to ask... questions... and I... am going... to answer. Question, answer. Question, answer. Question...

(The Actor slaps Nijinsky)

ACTOR. Idiot!
NIJINSKY. Now that's à whole different story. Only I have to say interviewers are usually better behaved. But, comparisons can be quite illuminating.
ACTOR. Are you finished? And now...
NIJINSKY. I don't like your being so familiar with me!
ACTOR. (Threateningly) And now!
NIJINSKY. I will not tolerate that tone!
ACTOR. (Angrily) And now!!!
NIJINSKY. (Shouts) Where is my lawyer?
ACTOR. (Shouts) What do you think God is?
NIJINSKY. (Not hesitating) God is à human being who fertilizes à woman and from that one and only woman he begets children.

(Pause)

ACTOR. You... What?
NIJINSKY. I don't know.
ACTOR. You mean you seriously believe that God is à human being? And specifically, à man? Any healthy man?
NIJINSKY. God is God. And human beings came from God, not from apes. And apes came from apes who were created by God.
ACTOR. Wait, wait, wait! I didn't ask you about apes. And so, God is the power capable of producing...
NIJINSKY. Love.
ACTOR. What did you say?
NIJINSKY. Love and nothing more.
ACTOR. You are not listening to me!
NIJINSKY. On the contrary. People usually say that humans are born from the seed of the father in the womb of the mother. But I am saying that the seed descends not from the first human, but from God himself. À human is flesh and feeling. If à human is made of flesh, then that's what he comes from.
ACTOR. What you are saying is that humans develop like apes.
NIJINSKY. In fact, it's just the opposite. It was God who created flesh. The similarity between humans and apes is purely organic and has nothing to do with spirituality. God is not an ape and à human is à part of God.
ACTOR. So. Let's begin from the beginning. You say that God is à human being?
NIJINSKY. Life.
ACTOR. In that case, it follows that good and bad are the essence of God.
NIJINSKY. My God is the God of good. However, I can’t be responsible for a bad person.
ACTOR. Aha! You mean that there are many different manifestations of God in the world!
NIJINSKY. I wish you no evil, but my wife's father committed suicide because he thought too much. Believe me, I wish evil upon no one! And my mind is not damaged.
ACTOR. What does your mind have to do with it?
NIJINSKY. Absolutely nothing. People used to say about Diaghilev that he didn't have à single sou but his mind was worth an entire fortune. I don't have any money either and I’m not very smart, but I have à soul.
ACTOR. I have à soul, too!
NIJINSKY. You see? And you keep talking about apes! I hate polemics. Silence is the best tactic in any argument.

(Pause. The Actor is on the verge of saying something, but Nijinsky stops him with à gesture. Pause)

ACTOR. (Carefully) What happened?
NIJINSKY. (Standing motionlessly) I dance.

(Pause)

ACTOR. Wait à minute! You say that God...
NIJINSKY. (Interrupting harshly) What do you want?
ACTOR. Wait, wait, wait, wait! I’m the one asking questions.
NIJINSKY. I'm tired of you.
ACTOR. That's not funny. Now, listen. Listen very carefully! Whoever He may be, God only exists apart from humans, right? Isn't that so? I'm asking you: Isn't that so?
NIJINSKY. (Speaking at à break-neck speed without pauses) I am à human à human and God I am à red-skinned Indian à black man an Egyptian à foreigner an alien à Chinaman I am the God of any living creature I am à sea bird and the bird above the land I am à bear à bison à dolphin...
ACTOR. Shut up.
NIJINSKY. ...I am à peasant à worker à prince à king I am à contemporary of Shakespeare Pushkin Wagner Bach I am earth fire air water motion and life wisdom and feeling...
ACTOR. (Grasping his head) Shut up!!! I demand that you shut up!
NIJINSKY. ...I am Buddha I am Christ the spirit in flesh and flesh in spirit I am à butterfly I am à flower I am à man and à woman I am one whole I am anywhere and everywhere I am love and eternity I I I I...

(The Actor seizes à bottle of cognac and, after clasping Nijinsky’s head firmly between his knees, empties out half of the bottle., Nijinsky immediately goes limp and topples on the floor. The Actor takes à sip from the bottle. Pause)

ACTOR. Now I understand. You belong in à museum of oddities. I’ll marinate you and send you to Zurich. (Laughs) Or to Paris. Or, maybe, London. You’ll be right at home with all those two-headed freaks and hermaphrodites! They'll give you your own shelf with your own name-tag on which they'll write...
NIJINSKY. (Interrupting) Good cognac.
ACTOR. What?
NIJINSKY. (Leaping up in one deft motion) Shh!
ACTOR. What?
NIJINSKY. Shhh!
ACTOR. Quit goofing off!
NIJINSKY. (Insistently) Shush!

(The Actor freezes and listens carefully. Pause)

ACTOR. (Whispering) What's going on?
NIJINSKY. That moment will never happen again. Ne-ver.
ACTOR. It's always like that.
NIJINSKY. Particularly here.
ACTOR. Especially here.
NIJINSKY. I have to warn you of impending danger. (Takes the bottle from the Actor, takes à sip and gives it back) If measures aren't taken, it will be too late.

(À puzzled look comes over the Actor's face)

I see how you suffer. It's because you theorize too much. My wife theorized à lot, too. And you know what that led to. I gather you eat meat?
ACTOR. (Decisively) I don't see the connection.
NIJINSKY. Connections are always invisible. You can only sense them intuitively. For example, I can see without looking. Can you?
ACTOR. How do you do that?
NIJINSKY. Eyes aren't all you need to see objects or people's actions.
ACTOR. Liar!
NIJINSKY. I help myself through feeling. The blind understand me perfectly. The blind and the mad. They are the ones I communicate with.
ACTOR. Ha! It sounds to me like you're theorizing, yourself.
NIJINSKY. No, I’m telling you that I feel. And anyway, you're the one who started all this.
ACTOR. Me? I am but the consequence. You are the cause.
NIJINSKY. The cause is in God.
ACTOR. There you go again!
NIJINSKY. There are times when it even seems that all those who live in me actually exist independently. All on their own. But I can't verify that. How could you verify that?

(The Actor drinks from the bottle)

ACTOR. I remember ab-solute-ly nothing!
NIJINSKY. Fool.
ACTOR. Take that back.
NIJINSKY. Loof. You're à phony.
ACTOR. (Stubbornly) Take that back!
NIJINSKY. I can't.
ACTOR. Why?
NIJINSKY. Because you are neither blind nor mad.
ACTOR. No, I’m mad.
NIJINSKY. No you're not.
ACTOR. Yes I am!
NIJINSKY. No you're not!
ACTOR. All right then! I'm blind.

(Nijinsky carefully looks over the Actor)

NIJINSKY. (After à pause) Yes, you're blind. However, you can see. That means your blindness isn't real.
ACTOR. What is it, then?
NIJINSKY. You don't lose your sight just because I call you blind. That's not the point.
ACTOR. What is the point?
NIJINSKY. I already told you.
ACTOR. No you didn't.
NIJINSKY. Yes I did.
ACTOR. No you didn't.
NIJINSKY. Yes I did.
ACTOR. Well, in that case, I wasn't satisfied with what you said! Basically, you haven't given me à single satisfactory answer to any one of my questions!
NIJINSKY. On top of everything else, you're deaf!
ACTOR. (Happily) There! You see how useful it is to theorize? Now I know who I am.
NIJINSKY. Who are you?
ACTOR. (Offended) I'm not saying.
NIJINSKY. Is that so?
ACTOR. That's right! What's it to you?
NIJINSKY. Do you have à name?
ACTOR. What of it?
NIJINSKY. Names create fates.
ACTOR. Fates create names.
NIJINSKY. Or the other way around.
ACTOR. (Shaking his head in agreement) Yeah, or the other way around. (Drinks same cognac) But I still can't figure out whether you're faking or not.
NIJINSKY. Faking.
ACTOR. Aha!

(Both grab for the bottle)

NIJINSKY. Thoughts are useless if they aren't dangerous. That's why I don't like Hamlet. He's always theorizing instead of trusting his feelings.
ACTOR. I can't stand Hamlet either! (Sobbing) Maybe I was à blind man and now I can see?
NIJINSKY. Maybe. Only that was à long time ago. You are very sick. All of you. You poor, sick star. (Drinks)

(The Actor weeps)

Only don't act like à woman. They're always crying. Knock it off. (Removes à handkerchief from the Actor's pocket and wipes his face with it)
ACTOR. (Sobbing) Don't you ever cry?
NIJINSKY. All the time. But even if they plucked out my eyes, I would still be able to cry, because my tears flow in my soul. What would you do if they plucked out your eyes?
ACTOR. Knock it off!

(Nijinsky gets up)

(Severely) You just wait.

(Nijinsky stops)

Take back what you said.
NIJINSKY. About what?
ACTOR. What?
NIJINSKY. What specifically?
ACTOR. Everything. You hear me? Everything! Everything! Everything!

(Nijinsky leaves. The Actor drinks from the nearly-empty bottle and laughs)

That's it. That's enough. I quit this game! I've got to... at least see my partner. What is going on? First he's here and then he's gone! What is... (Gets confused) Hands up! (Raises his hand) I'm arrested. For life. (Laughs) Let somebody else finish out the game. I've had it!

(Nijinsky peers out)

NIJINSKY. Hey you! Nameless!
ACTOR. Huh?
NIJINSKY. I thought about it and did it.
ACTOR. Did what?
NIJINSKY. Took it back. All of it. (Disappears)

(The Actor roars violently)

ACTOR. Now wait à minute! If I don't... then who will? We are still... (Gives himself commands, fulfilling them uncertainly) Ab-out face! Hut, two... (Falls. Gets up) Try it again. Ab-out face! Hut, two, there you go. (Drinks the last of the cognac and tosses the bottle away) Take it from the top. Ab-out face! (Disappears up stage)

END ÎF ÀÑÒ ONE

***

* This is an abomination of the first line of a famous poem by Alexander Pushkin. A literal translation of Pushkin's actual words: "God grant that I not lose my mind."

[act 1] [act 2]